Elo!
I’ve been thinking quite a bit about numbers, sizes, weights, yada yada …. over the last few days, and I have come to the conclusion that….
I will NOT LET A NUMBER DEFINE ME!!!!
Because in the grand scheme of things numbers are soooo not important. (Although studying to be an accountant, I could beg to differ!)
At the moment I’m living in trackie bottoms, skirts or leggings because I just don’t feel comfortable wearing jeans. Plus none of my old ones really fit me anymore! Mum said that she would buy me a pair of nice new jeans once I had gained some weight and the old ones were getting small. SOooooooo….
My rather slobby look of the moment - SoulCal trackies and any sweater, with a vest top underneath... oh and my beloved hairbandI went shopping with maman the other day, and after finding some jeans that I loved (awesome stonewash straight leg ones from River Island) I didn’t know what size to pick….. Should I go for a UK 8 or 10?? After a fair amount of just staring glazed eyes at the rail my mum obv thought enough was enough, picked up the 10 and booted me off to the changing room!
A 10! But I’ve never been a 10 in my life! I can’t possibly have to gain MORE weight when there’s 2 sizes below me! Aaaaaaaaaanywho, I tried on the 10 and yeah they were far too big, in fact would have dropped off without a belt, so I asked mum to get the 8. She did so reluctantly, and I tried them on and they were literally skin tight! What is with that?! surely that's quite a difference between sizes?
So basically I am an inbetweeny at the moment! And nothing fits.
In the past I would have bought the 8, because that is an ‘acceptable’ size to Ed’s brain and probs lost weight to make sure I could fit in them….. but NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! That is so so wrong! There IS no ‘acceptable’ size and just cos manufacturers make clothes in tiny sizes doesn’t mean it’s healthy to wear them. After all, they make size 22+ but it doesn’t mean they are saying that it is a healthy size to be.
Instead of using this lil outing as a setback I am now even more motivated to be able to fit the size 10’s, cos at my height that’s probably a fairly healthy size to be. The longer I mess around and linger in this limbo between healthy and unhealthy, the longer I will have to go without jeans aaah! And there really couldn’t be any better motivation than that! Onwards and upwards with the eating malarkey!!
Not the most thrilling pic of weetabix and sugar - but wait! look at the size of the spoon - YEAH that is most certainly not a teaspoon :)
My green tea told me today that 'Grace brings contenment' - not exactly sure what to make of that, but I rather like it that my tea quotes things to me everyday :p
The charm bracelet that I was on about.
Love Amy xxx 
2 comments:
hey you. i tried commenting on ur last post, but t'internet was being silly so i dont think it worked...
just wanted to say.. WELL DONE for going for the size 10's!!! its weird how similar my situation is, ive been eyeing up some skinny jeans in river island for a while now (they have some serously nice stuff at the mo!) but i havent got them, cos ive said i refuse to buy jeans until i can fit into a prper sized pair not some ridiculous size 6 ones... (even they dont fit properly whats up with my body shape, im lke the weirdest shape ever!) so yup, im doing the tracky bottom thing too. i dont even like wearing skirts at the mo, cos if i wear them with tights my legs look all scrawny. Argh!!!
but keep up with the eats and those jeans will be rocking on you soon!
p.s well done with the spoon vs teaspoon thing. im battling the same OCD ness, its so annoying. i keep realising ive unconciously chosen the teaspoon and i have to keep stopping myself and getting a different one. cue... extra washing up!!! grrr..
email me if you want to chat, it seems like we have alot of similarities!!! :-) xx
Hey hey,
thanks for the post! here is my email adress so i dont fill up ur blog wall... clemmystar@yahoo.co.uk
artistickyness is overrated! i dont actually think im all that good at art but im pretty creative and as long as im better than the kids im teaching, i think thats good enough!!
that makes total sense about the fear foods, sometimes i just convince myself that i dont 'like' them but actually, i probably would if i gave them a chance, but im taking it step by step at the mo, so im sure that'll come with time....
hoodie sunbathing is indeed a regular hobby of mine. altho today the sun is hiding behind a big old grey cloud, hmmphf... probs best cos i do look a bit of a wally walking around in my big coat when people are strutting about in shorts! bring on the weight gain, i cannot take another summer hidden in baggy clothes, ive got such nice clothes... they wanna be SEEEEEEN!
but still, ive got a whole term to get thru before summer holidays start, and oints to you miss marple....!! i surely am rocking the private school, longer holidays and better behaved kids. oh yeah!!! i trained in the state school sector tho, so dont think im an educational snob :-p
what are you studying at uni?? you must have longer holidays than schools, some of my friends at uni are finishing for summer in mid may!!!
xx
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